Tuesday, September 23, 2008

The weekend hyperbole

The weekend was long and boring. But I did clean out my closet.
If you saw the photo posted earlier, you couldn't tell the layer o' crap that was on the floor. But now, all clean.

Then, my husband decided he was going into hyperbole mode and totally pissed me off.

Not gonna get lucky with that attitude, dude.

Hyperbole # 1: you are always such a cold bitch.

Well, that could be a true statement, especially when your ass is planted in that recliner, and I want my way.
Oh, don't worry dear, cold bitch you want, cold bitch you'll get.
You don't want to play this game with me, the non talker (I know, can you believe it?). I can go for DAYS without talking so you loose.

Hyperbole # 2 : you have clothes hanging on EVERY door in the house.
Ok, the bathroom door, maybe. It IS the laundry room too, so I was just hanging up my clothes out of the dryer. But EVERY door? Puulleeezzeee!
Because I cleaned the closet and moved my granny's dresser in there, he thinks I now can't fit my clothes in there. We'll see. Maybe they will just live on the bathroom door.
Permanently!

Hyperbole # 3: (on the phone with who knows who) " I have to clean the fridge because it has NEVER been cleaned. "
This, I am sure is a poke at me. But we both work and sheesh, the fridge is only 3 months old. Can it BE that dirty?

It is no secret that I was born in the wrong era and was suppose to be a princess with ladies in waiting and servants and such because I hate cleaning. Oh wait, maybe I was suppose to be a MAN!!!

Just a small example of the hyperbole rage I experienced this weekend.
He must have been on his period.



Awe, he must've felt bad. Tonight he went out and bought us all IPhones.
Not that I really wanted one, but do you think I could download a bloggy reader? All access - all the time.

This may be good.

Have a very interesting girls night out planned for tomorrow night.
Will keep you posted later.

12 comments:

  1. I should have been one of your sisters when you were a princess. I loathe housework and can't understand how some (a few) love to do it?!?!

    Enjoy your night out!

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  2. I loooove cleaning. I suppose I was meant to be a slave. A well dressed slave, but a slave at any rate. Can't wait to hear about your girls night out.

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  3. PS: Give Salty a break!!!!!

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  4. I once had a boyfriend (we were living together) who one night started to seethe because apparently he hadn't been cleaning out the refrigerator to see how long it would take *me* to do it. I think my response of "people clean refrigerators?!" was his first hint that we're not soul mates.

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  5. Ok, this is too weird, told someone yesterday that I should have been a man for these exact reasons, (absolutely despise cleaning)well, not the name calling and I could NEVER give the silent treatment, I am too loud and ALWAYS have too much to say!!! I am still waiting to become a princess, no actually a lady of leisure with no expectations or strings attached. Hope you had fun tonight....

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  6. You got an Iphone for not doing things quite right??? Man, I should have about 12 of them then.

    I often think life would be easier if I was a man. Go to work, come home, eat food, drink beer, go to bed, get laid.....what a life. My to-do lists don't look anything like that...

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  7. thanks "guys", I don't feel so all alone.

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  8. Never even heard of Hyperbole...but when My husband acts like that...I call it Jack A$* moments...they are rare, but he has them! :)

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  9. well there are always bad days in a man's life....

    visit my blog at stacchus.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  10. well there are always bad days in a man's life....

    visit my blog at stacchus.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  11. OK it is Thursday, no blog, and no report on the girls night out?!

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  12. Joseph - sorry you had to come by on a rant and rave.
    I like your travel blog.

    MissMel - I am working on it!

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